I have taken a few days out to rest and think and suddenly it’s clear that I have to say goodbye to many parts of my life - including my brief time on these pages (at least for now).

I have poured out my soul into this short blog for anyone to see. I’ve endlessly professed my love for my wife and my despair at the thought of parting. I’ve taken comfort and criticism from strangers and I’m grateful for both.

But I’ve been living in a fantasy world of hope and denial - and that can’t continue for all our sakes. I have to face up to the things I can’t change and get real.

I have four children to provide for, including two aged 5 and 7 who need their father’s focused love and reassurance; I need to maintain this echoing house to give them continuity when their mother leaves; I have to safeguard my business, with others looking to me to protect their jobs in these bleak times.

What use am I to those I love and have responsibility for, if I carry on as the zombie I have been of late?

In recent weeks I’ve felt that I have no influence over the situation - except to trap her with my pain when I couldn’t keep her with my love.

But I know now what I have to do….

I have to say ENOUGH – and set us both free. We need to stop the leaking tap and retain the last few drops of what we had, to sustain us in our separate years ahead. No more persuasion; no more harsh words; no more what-might-have-been; no more traps; no more guilt to hold her back…

Thank you for the happy times that we had and for our two precious children. We will be OK now….that’s my parting gift to you, my darling wife.

“Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose”.